Why Etiquettes?

Past & Present

Louis XIV's gardener at Versailles was faced with a serious problem: he could not stop members of the nobility from trampling about in the delicate areas of the King's garden. He finally attempted to dissuade their unwanted behavior by posting signs, called etiquets, which warned them to "Keep off the Grass." When this course of action failed, the King himself had to issue an official decree that no one could go beyond the bounds of the signs. Later, the name "etiquette" was given to a ticket for court functions that included rules regarding where to stand and what to do. The word 'etiquette' has evolved, but in many ways it still means "Keep off the Grass." Remaining within the flexible boundaries of civil behaviour allows relationships and us to grow like flowers in Louis' garden. Moreover, it lets us present ourselves with confidence and authority in all areas of our professional and personal life. In our own society, good manners were considered an important part of a cultured person's upbringing until the 1960's.

Educational institutions incorporated social graces as a crucial aspect of a well-rounded curriculum, and finishing schools specialized in etiquette, deportment and proper manners at the table. The '60s and '70s ushered in a decline in the popularity of etiquette training. The return to traditional social values in the '80s and '90s, partly as a reaction to the previous two decades, has created an increasing awareness of the importance good manners have in our culture. As our world becomes a smaller place and our economy becomes increasingly global in scope, it is becoming increasingly clear how important good manners are in all cultures.

Did u Know?

Being comfortable in a variety of environments and cultures is one of the end results of etiquette training. That's the reason why it is necessary to know the thumb rules of etiquettes in any situation because:-

Your inability to handle yourself as expected could be expensive. No one will tell you the real reason you didn't get the job, the promotion, or the social engagement. Fair or not, others equate bad manners with incompetence and a lack of breeding.
40 percent of all adults have social anxiety, and 75 percent of all adults experience anxiety at a party with strangers
The importance of etiquette is thousands of years old. Around 2500B.C. the first etiquette manuscript gave this advice to young Egyptian men on the fast track: "When sitting with one's superior, laugh when he laughs."
The most successful business is built on a foundation of rapport. People prefer doing business with those people who mirror their own values.

Whether you are creating an invitation or sending a holiday greeting, you may be seeking just the right wording, or considering how something should be said to fall within the bounds of etiquette. Which, of course, raises the question, why is etiquette important?

Etiquettes are social rules that each culture or society adopts over time. Some are written, and some are unwritten. Etiquette is meant to help us interact with one another as we hold to common moral, social and community values in an atmosphere of mutual respect. As the world becomes more connected and we interact increasingly with people of other countries, languages and cultures, knowing, learning and observing etiquette is increasingly important.

You may be surprised to learn, for instance, that pointing at something with your index finger is considered rude in some cultures or eating with your left hand is considered unclean in many countries or in some regions social bathing is completely normal and acceptable or showing your emotions in public in some cultures is unacceptable. These simple and seemingly random acts have meaning within the social and moral etiquette of those other cultures.

When you observe etiquette in your invitations and greetings by proper use of names, observing formal and informal styles and replying and sending with adequate notice, you are showing respect to your guests and friends and conveying your own values and character through your correspondence. Here are a few simple "rules of etiquette" that our own culture observes-and expects-of its members:

Greeting relatives, friends and acquaintances with warmth and respect
Refraining from insults and prying curiosity
Offering hospitality to guests
Wearing clothing suited to the occasion
Contributing to conversations without dominating them
Offering assistance to those in need
Eating neatly and quietly
Avoiding disturbing others with unnecessary noise
Following established rules of an organization upon becoming a member
Arriving promptly when expected
Comforting the bereaved
Responding to invitations promptly
Accepting gifts or favors with humility and to acknowledge them promptly with thanks (for instance, a thank you note)